Quality vs. Quantity: The Making of Good TV

Firefly Mal Inara and Jayne

Image: fireflyfans.net

We’ve lamented before over the loss of Firefly, Joss Whedon’s sci-fi western epic which was tragically cut down in its first and only season. Even though we eventually got to see the ending as a movie, fans continue to wish for more adventures with Captain Mal and the crew of the ship Serenity.

However, if fans did receive their wish and Firefly had lasted for multiple seasons, would we still consider it one of the finest sci-fi shows on television? Would the romance between Simon and Kaylee have been drawn out for a ridiculously long time, only to fizzle out when they did get together? Would actors leave the show halfway, making us hate their replacements? Would Firefly have eventually jumped the shark?

The Simpsons Family

Image: thecomicscomic.com

In a perfect world a television show would play only as long for as long as it was still engaging and the last episode would air right before the show became tired and boring. Once-quality shows like The Simpsons and The Office would be put out to pasture while at the top of their game, instead of suffering for years. Is it even worth having so many episodes of The Simpsons that the show could support its own cable network when fans only care about the earlier seasons?

Maybe we should take a cue from across the pond and set up our shows the way they do in England. That would mean only a few seasons of a show, and only a handful of episodes per season.Spaced might have had a small run by American standards, but it’s a work of pure genius that similar shows like The Big Bang Theory couldn’t hope to reproduce.

Spaced Tim and Mike

Image: filmschoolrejects.com

Smaller shows mean smaller budgets, allowing networks to take greater risks on weird shows like The Mighty Boosh.  Given the same limitations over here, there’s no doubt that we’d see a golden renaissance of American television and terms like “jump the shark” would be obsolete.

On the other hand, consider how different shows like Parks and Recreation or Community would be if they were cut off after only six episodes. Many television shows don’t hit their stride until the second or third season as the actors further develop the characters and writers weave a complex world. We’ve all found ourselves telling a friend “Once you get past the first couple of episodes, this show is really great.”

Cast of Arrested Development

Image: screenrant.com

Maybe the creators of Arrested Development were the only ones who got it right. Although the show only aired for three seasons, it was enough time for the cast to develop an amazing chemistry and for the writers to build up a number of inside jokes and catch phrases. The show was taken off the air just before it began to show any flaws and is now scheduled to return to TV once again.

In the battle between quantity versus quality, the winner may in fact be both. The ideal TV show would be one with unlimited episodes that are always consistent in quality.

Don’t Miss This Episode: SNL’s “Steve Martin/The Blues Brothers”

Steve Martin King Tut

Image Source: amazon.com

Our blog series Don’t Miss This Episode takes you in to the standout episodes of your favorite shows.

Who in their right mind would set about trying to pinpoint the most unmissable Saturday Night Live? What deranged mind could possibly sift through thirty-seven seasons’ worth of episodes, searching for the best of the best? Internet, meet moi. I am said crazy individual–well, me and these guys. And maybe these ones, too. Whatever. They are my brethren and this is my quest. Continue reading

My Uninformed Impressions of Five Shows I’ve Never Watched

A Television for Watching

Image source: Inventorsdigest.com

Yeah, I watch a lot of television. I have a very long list of shows I enjoy, and I’m usually willing to give new ones a single episode trial run, at the very least. But there are only so many hours in a day and sometimes I have to write blog posts. So, inevitably, there are some shows I just haven’t seen. Sometimes I genuinely don’t want to watch something because it looks stupid. Other times, it’s just a sad reality of living: too much T.V., too little life to waste on it. But not watching a show doesn’t stop me from forming an opinion. Usually it’s based on partially glimpsed advertisements, tabloid news, overheard conversations, and muted commercials. Here are my uninformed impressions/opinions of five shows I’ve never watched. Enjoy.

Dancing With the Stars

Kirstie Alley on Dancing With the Stars

Image source: Aroundthenetworks.com

It’s fun to watch people try to do something they don’t know how to do. Overweight people like Kirstie Alley give us an exciting real-time progression of before-to-after. People we think are unusual or otherwise freakshowish like Chaz Bono are encouraged, because what’s better than watching a freak dance? Nothing. I imagine there are lots of dance studio shots of celebrities breaking down or getting divaish. Also, there are long pauses before they announce the winners of each round. Am I right?

Hoarders

Hoarders

Image source: Fanpop.com

There is nothing less appealing to me than a reality television show that exploits people with real psychiatric disorders. It’s not cool to enjoy illness and suffering, no matter how shocking or sensational it may seem. This is the kind of show people in sci-fi dystopias watch on television—when all ethical and moral quandaries have been supplanted with Victory Gin and lobotomies.

Bear Grylls: Man vs. Wild

Bear Grylls: Man vs. Wild

Image source: Aetv.com

Eff you, Bear Grylls. You’re not Steve Irwin and you never will be. I bet you have a film crew ready to bail you out every second and you secretly sleep in hotels when you’re supposed to be surviving on desert islands or whatever. Or maybe that’s the survival show guy? I don’t know. I’ve never watched him either.

Storage Wars

Storage Wars Cast

Image source: Latimesblogs.latimes.com

So this is where people go to storage units and fight over what’s in them, right? I can see how this could be awesome if the storage units were owned by like a Sting or a Jay-Z, but I bet Sting and Jay-Z pay their monthly storage bills. Instead it’s probably show after show of hagglers haggling over picture frames and candlesticks. Not to mention the poor people who get to watch their family heirlooms in a tug-of-war on T.V. No thanks.

The Real Housewives Franchise

Real Housewives Los Angeles

Image source: Latimesblogs.latimes.com

Considering my ridiculous attachment to Jersey Shore, maybe I should give this a chance. But I wonder, rather than oranging-up for a T.V. show, shouldn’t they be, like, bonding with their kids or doing other “real” housewifey things? It just seems to me like a bunch of filthy rich ladies with weird surgery faces complaining about their tiny dogs.

Five Mad Predictions for Mad Men Season Five

Cast of Mad Men on AMC

Image: deadline.com

The last time we had a new episode of Mad Men to watch was back in October of 2010. Since then we’ve watched shows like Pan-Am and The Playboy Club try, and fail, to recapture the retro-dramatic intrigue that makes Mad Men so popular. March 25th marks the debut of Season Five on AMC and with such a long gap in between the production schedule, we’re guaranteed to see some changes to the show. Here are just a few things we think will be different when Mad Men returns from hiatus.

Time Travel

Mad Men Cast

Image: abc.cs

Mad Men season premieres have been known to fast forward the story ahead a few years. With an almost two-year hiatus between seasons, we can be sure to see another time jump this year. We left the show in 1965, so it’s anyone’s guess as to what year the next season will be. Could Mad Men jump five years ahead and become the next That 70’s Show?

The Next Mrs. Draper

Don Draper and Fiance Megan

Image: montrealstateofmind.com

The finale cliffhanger from last season was Don proposing to his secretary Megan. The couple didn’t have a long courtship, so we’re thinking that a long engagement is out. We’ll start the season either with Don and Megan’s wedding or with a happily married couple who are expecting their first baby together.

Sally the Teen

Mad Men Sally Draper

Image: carolynyates.com

We watched Sally mature in Season Four and it’s sure to be a continuing theme as the show progresses. With Sally going through puberty we can expect plenty of clashes between her and Betty—and possibly new stepmother, Megan. Sally is likely to be a bigger part of Don’s life as he struggles with his little girl blossoming into a woman of the 60’s.

Joan the Widow

Mad Men Joan with Husband Greg

Image: blogspot.com

We all know now that the Vietnam War was brutal and bloody, but Joan will probably find that out the hard way. As the only main character with a loved one serving in the war, the odds are not in favor of her husband Greg returning home safely. However, Joan is also carrying Roger’s baby, so her husband’s death might just make a complicated situation much easier to deal with.

Peggy Breaks Out

Mad Men Peggy Olson

Image: blogcdn.com

We’ve watched Peggy go from meek typing girl to full fledged copywriter, but she’s not done getting hers just yet. She seemed unsure of her future with the company when we last saw her—could this be the season where Peggy breaks out on her own? It would be entertaining to watch the student take on her teacher and have Peggy working at a rival company, competing with Don over a client

Boutique Reality Show: The Adam Carolla Project

adam carolla striped shirt

Image From: Premium Hollywood

For every long-running reality show (Survivor, The Amazing Race, etc.), there also exists one that lasted for just a brief, shining moment in time. There are a multitude of reasons why a show doesn’t take off. Sometimes it’s really terrible, sometimes it’s great but doesn’t connect with a wide audience, and sometimes the show premise is such that anything more than a season or two would be redundant, and would dilute the greatness of the show. I consider these to be the boutique reality shows; small, special, and not widely available. Today, I’ll talk about one of my favorites of these, The Carolla Project.

Continue reading

What Happened to the I.T. Crowd?

I.T. Crowd 8 bit logo

Image source: three-ninjas.co.uk

Last October, show runner Graham Linehan announced the cancellation of British geek-friendly comedy The I.T. Crowd after only four seasons (man, those Brits need to learn to milk their shows until they run themselves into the ground like we do). Although The I.T. Crowd was slated for a fifth season to start production this year, it seems that Linehan himself has opted to cease the show’s run, but promises an extended special in 2012. Continue reading

Portlandia Makes Giant Leap From Real City to Sketch Show to Reading Material

Portlandia Bird Sketch

Image Source: online.wsj.com

I shudder to think of how many of my hipster, microbrewery-frequenting, bespectacled Portland brethren are going to go out and ironically buy this new book they’ve got cooking up. You see, folks, the good people behind the IFC’s Portlandia are not content to lovingly (and accurately) spoof my city week-in and week-out. Continue reading

Creepiest Children’s Shows of the ‘80s

In the ‘80s, camp was king and its empire touched most everything. Some 22 years later, a decade’s worth of camp has since transformed into creepy YouTube fodder – and children’s shows are no exception.

ALF

ALF With A Pencil

Image Source: 3.bp.blogspot.com

Let’s start with the obvious: ALF eats cats. That’s pretty freaking weird. Wanna get a whole lot weirder? ALF is an alien from the planet Melmac. To make matters even stranger, he somehow crash-landed in suburban Los Angeles and took up residence in the garage of the Tanner family. Dad plays the skeptical antagonist, who regards ALF more like a deadbeat stepson than a feline-hungry Alien Life Form.

Small Wonder

Vicki From Small Wonder

Image Source: 4.bp.blogspot.com

Kids are creepy enough on their own. So what happens when an already creepy-looking kid transforms into an even creepier robot? That’s precisely what Ted Lawson, robotics engineer and Lawson family patriarch, set out to find when he created the robot-child V.I.C.I (Voice Input Child Indenticant – pronounced Vicki). Sure, she almost looks like a regular nine-year-old child, maybe if you squint your eyes and forget about the AC outlet in her arm. While you’re at it, you should also dismiss her super human strength, the access panel in her back, and her failed attempts to learn human behavior.

Zoobilee Zoo

The Cast of Zoobilee Zoo

Image Source: 24.media.tumblr.com

Maybe it’s just me but I’ve always found Ben Vereen to be kind of disturbing. He’s just… too happy. Put him in a prosthetic animal nose and a two-bit costume from the original Broadway production of Cats? Wowzers. The rest of the lesser-known actors who comprise the cast are truly the stuff of nightmares. They sing, they dance, and they frolic, all the while wearing greasy face paint and fuzzy polyester wigs. Truly terrifying.

Mr. Rogers’ Neighborhood

Mr. Rogers With His King Puppet

Image Source: blog.pennlive.com

Four words: old dude with puppets. All he’s missing is some licorice candy in his pocket and he’d be a full-on creeper. Oh, and what’s with his flat, off key singing? And who’s operating the train set? And how does Mr. Rogers’ own an entire neighborhood? And, on that note, what does he do for a living? It is important questions like these, I fear, that just might follow me to the grave.

Bozo the Clown

Bozo the Clown in the 1980s

Image Source: 2.bp.blogspot.com

Surely the creators of The Simpsons’ character Krustee the Clown had to draw at least a little inspiration from Bozo the Clown. Not only does he look like a guy that probably has some real “sad clown” issues going on, but he is also pretty sketchy-looking. I will concede that I have a bit of a bias against white clown makeup. For starters, it made Bozo’s teeth look super yellow. It also made his eyes appear bloodshot, which would lead most logical people to question his activities prior to taping. Personally, I’d like to see Bozo touch his shiny clown nose and walk a straight line.

TV Couples That Should Get Together for Valentine’s Day

After watching characters on TV for an extended period of time, you start to feel like they’re your best friends. But unlike your real best friends, you can’t tell TV characters that their constant flirting is getting tired and that they should probably just date already. This Valentine’s Day, let’s hope that Cupid’s arrow finally finds these TV couples so that they can drop the romantic tension act and finally consummate what we’ve all known was going to happen for awhile.

Jack and Liz – 30 Rock

Jack and Liz 30 Rock

Image: wordpress.com

Jack and Liz’s relationship might be best described as a ‘bromance,’ but it’s one that could easily turn into something real. Jack provides Liz with the tools to become a responsible adult while Liz provides Jack with an opportunity to relax and enjoy life. Jack’s recent meddling in Liz’s relationship even further confirms how desperately these two should just admit that they need each other.

Sookie and Alcide – True Blood

Sookie and Alcide True Blood

Image: vampires.com

There have been so many guys in Sookie’s life—Bill, Sam, Eric– but none seem quite the right match as Sookie and werewolf Acide. Maybe it’s because she sees him as a friend that she allows herself to be so much less annoying when she’s around him—or maybe it’s because we feel sorry that Alcide is stuck with crazy Debbie as a wife. Either way, these two should become the new alpha couple in Bon Temps.

Britta and Troy – Community

Community Britta and Troy

Image: tv.com

Even though Jeff spent the first season trying to get with Britta, that romantic plotline has since fizzled out to make way for Britta and Troy. These two loveable dummies feel more natural than Jeff and Britta ever did. Jeff is callous and calculating, while Troy is sensitive and sweet—which is a better match for bleeding heart Britta.

Carol and Daryl – The Walking Dead

The Walking Dead Carol and Daryl

Image: unaffiliatedcritic.com

Despite their unfortunate rhyming names, these two survivors seem like they’re a zombie attack away from jumping into a relationship together. Carol sees the good in Daryl that even Daryl himself isn’t able to see. Now that Sophia is dead, it’s time for Daryl to step up and be that good man that Carol needs.

Damon and Elena – The Vampire Diaries

Damon and Elena The Vampire Diaries

Image: fanpop.com

Sure, getting together with your brother’s ex-girlfriend is going to make family gatherings that much more awkward, but that shouldn’t stop Damon and Elena from going official. Even if Elena and Stefan fans were so upset that they sent death threats to the show’s creators when Damon kissed Elena, we think ‘Delena’ is here to stay.

 

 

 

Fox’s House Finally Flatlines

House, M.D. main cast

Image Source: Listal.com

Leaving itself wide open for all manner of bad medical-terminology-death puns, Fox has decided to cancel its long-running medical drama House after eight seasons of furrowed brows and sticking it to the man.

The press release seems to convey the personal loss and sadness of all involved in the making of House. Continue reading