Ah, Friday. A time when all things seem new and possible. Unless you’re me, in which case you live in Portland so it’s raining and you have to get up at five-thirty in the morning and immediately interact with six-year-olds, which is a fate I would wish upon very few people. But though my socks might be dampened, my spirit is not–plus, it was quite the week for television. Let’s review:
1. Jeff Goldblum was cast as one of Lea Michele’s gay dads on Glee. Time to find out whether endearingly awkward nebbishness is an inherited or learned trait.
2. Miss Piggy guest starred on Project Runway. I am not entirely sure where the whole “Muppets-as-guest-judges-on-otherwise-fairly-serious-competitions” trend came along (I’m looking at you, Top Chef) but let’s all think about the reality that one person’s hopes and dreams were crushed after they failed to design an adequate outfit…for a muppet. Which, let me remind you, is a PUPPET with someone’s hand attached to its BACK END.
3. Eternal font of controversy 30 Rock finally addresses Tracy Morgan’s gay slurs. I love how on any other show Morgan would likely have been fired, whereas 30 Rock decided to give it a two-part-episode treatment.
4. A 62-year-old Florida woman attacked a man with a hammer because she was upset with Judge Judy. Which, let’s face it, is not an alien emotion to any of us.
5. A&E is apparently thinking about doing a Psycho prequel series. Except that we kind of already know how the whole thing ended. But hey, that didn’t stop Titanic, did it?
6. Twilight, like the vampires it depicts, refuses to die already. The CEO of Lionsgate, apparently intent on wringing every cent from the Twilight franchise’s cold, bloodless, sparkly body, has hinted that it might even become a TV show. Suddenly, that whole Honey Badger thing ain’t lookin’ too bad, huh?
7. Daniel Radcliffe hosted Saturday Night Live. And he did a pretty great job! Most of the reviews have praised his “enthusiasm”, which is sort of patronizing tone I use when one of the kids I work with decides to cover himself, the other children, and my shoes with lime green acrylic paint.
8. David Letterman’s comedy booker apparently thinks that women aren’t funny. Which is why there was only one female comedian on the show in 2011. And if history has taught us anything it’s that women aren’t funny. I mean, just look at this:
“Not funny”. Harumph.
9. American Idol is back! Now we can calculate the amount of time it takes to flip from that to The X Factor to The Voice to America’s Got Talent to that one kinda weird karaoke competition. Selecting a vocal competition show is becoming a lot like choosing a type of peanut butter at the grocery store.
10. And for those of you keeping track at home, it is now at least 11 months and 11 days until I will have another episode of Sherlock. Please contact me for a mailing address at which I will be accepting consolation gifts of chocolate, money or decorative kelp lamps.
What does next week have in store? I can hardly wait to find out. What are you looking forward to? Let me know below!