TV Couples That Should Get Together for Valentine’s Day

Posted on February 9, 2012 by Kris M.

After watching characters on TV for an extended period of time, you start to feel like they’re your best friends. But unlike your real best friends, you can’t tell TV characters that their constant flirting is getting tired and that they should probably just date already. This Valentine’s Day, let’s hope that Cupid’s arrow finally finds these TV couples so that they can drop the romantic tension act and finally consummate what we’ve all known was going to happen for awhile.

Jack and Liz – 30 Rock

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Jack and Liz’s relationship might be best described as a ‘bromance,’ but it’s one that could easily turn into something real. Jack provides Liz with the tools to become a responsible adult while Liz provides Jack with an opportunity to relax and enjoy life. Jack’s recent meddling in Liz’s relationship even further confirms how desperately these two should just admit that they need each other.

Sookie and Alcide – True Blood

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There have been so many guys in Sookie’s life—Bill, Sam, Eric– but none seem quite the right match as Sookie and werewolf Acide. Maybe it’s because she sees him as a friend that she allows herself to be so much less annoying when she’s around him—or maybe it’s because we feel sorry that Alcide is stuck with crazy Debbie as a wife. Either way, these two should become the new alpha couple in Bon Temps.

Britta and Troy – Community

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Even though Jeff spent the first season trying to get with Britta, that romantic plotline has since fizzled out to make way for Britta and Troy. These two loveable dummies feel more natural than Jeff and Britta ever did. Jeff is callous and calculating, while Troy is sensitive and sweet—which is a better match for bleeding heart Britta.

Carol and Daryl – The Walking Dead

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Despite their unfortunate rhyming names, these two survivors seem like they’re a zombie attack away from jumping into a relationship together. Carol sees the good in Daryl that even Daryl himself isn’t able to see. Now that Sophia is dead, it’s time for Daryl to step up and be that good man that Carol needs.

Damon and Elena – The Vampire Diaries

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Sure, getting together with your brother’s ex-girlfriend is going to make family gatherings that much more awkward, but that shouldn’t stop Damon and Elena from going official. Even if Elena and Stefan fans were so upset that they sent death threats to the show’s creators when Damon kissed Elena, we think ‘Delena’ is here to stay.

Be Our Guest: February Guest Stars We’re Pumped to Watch

Posted on February 8, 2012 by Bailey C.

Image Source: tv.yahoo.com

Now that we’ve got Ricky Martin’s gyrations on Glee sort of out of our system (they should invent some sort of celebrity cleansing diet for that–I’m thinking something along the lines of the dreaded cabbage soup diet, except this one is called Ricky B Gone), it’s time to turn our eyes forward, ever forward, to the rest of the (fairly impressive) celebrity guest lineup for February’s television programming. Here are a few of my personal favorites: Continue reading →

Four Supporting Actresses Who Deserve Their Own Show and One Who Actually Got It

Posted on February 3, 2012 by Kris M.

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You probably know who Judy Greer is, even if you don’t know her name. This funny gal has made a career for herself playing supporting roles such as Kitty from Arrested Development and “Fatty Magoo” from It’s Always Sunny in Philadelphia. If you don’t recognize her face, you might recognize her voice as clueless secretary Cheryl on the animated comedy Archer.

Even if you don’t know Judy Greer by now, you will get to know her soon enough. Greer has her own sitcom in the works over at ABC called American Judy, in which she plays a city gal who moves to the suburbs with her new husband and his family. For those of us who have been following this talented comedic actress, it’s about time she got the recognition and starring role she deserves.

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Judy Greer isn’t the only supporting TV actress to be recently promoted to a starring role. Mindy Kaling, who plays vapid customer service rep Kelly on The Office, is in talks to star in her own sitcom at Fox. We love both these funny ladies and wish them all the success in the world on their new shows.

We also can’t help but wonder which other supporting sitcom actresses deserve the chance to step into a starring role. These four actresses are poised to hit it big, if and when their chance to star in a sitcom ever comes along.

Kristen Schaal

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Kristen Schaal is best known for her portrayal of obsessed fan Mel on HBO’s Flight of the Conchords, but the actress has also provided commentary on The Daily Show and the voice of Louise on Bob’s Burgers. Her next gig will be playing a reoccurring NBC page character on 30 Rock. Schaal has a knack for playing oddball characters, which would translate well into a single-camera comedy.

Ellie Kemper

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Even after eight seasons on the air, The Office is still pumping out comedy stars. Ellie Kemper joined the cast in 2005 as Erin, the happy-go-lucky but incredible naïve secretary. Since then, she’s gone to play a memorable supporting role in the hit movie Bridesmaids. Kemper plays innocent-yet-stupid with an effortlessness that almost makes you wonder how much she’s faking it.

Aubrey Plaza

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Audiences know Aubrey Plaza as Ron Swanson’s sarcastic assistant April on Parks and Recreation. This stand-up comedian turned actress has also had memorable roles in movies like Funny People and Scott Pilgrim vs. the World. We love her dry, deadpan sense of humor and would love to see this young actress rise to prominence over the next few years.

Jane Lynch

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We all know who Jane Lynch is by now—her Sue Sylvester character on Glee is practically infamous at this point. She’s done it all—she played an actress turned waitress on Party Down, she made memorable cameos in a number of films including The 40-Year-Old Virgin, she even hosted the Emmy Awards. Lynch can only get bigger from here and it’s time prove that with a starring role.

Fictional TV Awards We Think We Have a Shot at Winning

Posted on February 2, 2012 by Kris M.

Image: photobucket.com

Television actors and actresses are awarded with a number of accolades each year, from the prestigious Emmy Awards to the slime-covered Nickelodeon Kids’ Choice Awards. For all the praise we heap onto television actors, the characters that they portray rarely get the recognition they deserve.

So when a TV character does receive an honor, it’s a triumphant occasion worthy of an outrageous award that could only exist in TV land. However, if these TV awards were real, we think we’d have a really good chance of winning one of them—if not all of them.

The Dundies – The Office

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The Dundies aren’t just your run-of-the-mill office awards, they are a extravagant event emceed by uber-boss Michael Scott. There are jokes, music, an excessive amount of drinking and then there’s the prize–a glorious golden statuette known as a Dundie. Each Dundie is unique to the person who wins it, with categories that include “Cutest Redhead in the Office Award,” “Show Me the Money Award” and “Spicy Curry Award.”

Sure, everybody in the office gets a Dundie, so it’s not exactly hard to win one—the real trick is winning a good Dundie and not something slightly offensive. It’d be really easy to win the “Whitest Sneakers Award”, but also really easy to accidentally win the “Don’t Go In There After Me Award” too. Our safest bet? The “Fine Work Award.” You really just need to show up to work to win it.

The Shiva – The League

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Some fantasy football leagues play for money, others play for fun—but the league from The League play for a much more sacred award—the legendary Shiva. Named after the guys’ sexy high school classmate Shivakamini Somakandarkram, the Shiva is a sacred shrine adorned with items swiped from the real Shiva.

Even if we’d rather watch the Puppy Bowl than the Super Bowl, we still think the Shiva could be within our grasp—afterall, Taco has come close before and he doesn’t even try to play right. Winning the Shiva takes the ability to backstab, to psych out your opponents and to cheat if necessary. All we have to do is turn off our natural instinct for empathy and the Shiva will fall into our laps.

Most – 30 Rock

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NBC executive Jack Donaghy is an accomplished man with nearly superhuman qualities—so when he graduated from Harvard Business School, his classmates voted him “Most.” Forget “Best Hair” or “Most Likely to Succeed,” this is the senior class award we wish we could win the most.

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It wouldn’t be easy to achieve such an extreme level of excellence, but Jack worked his way up to the top of the food chain from a childhood of impoverishment. Who’s to say we couldn’t do the same? Granted we’d need his charm, his wit and Alec Baldwin’s good looks—but anything is possible if you pull yourself up by your bootstraps and psych yourself up in the mirror using advertising slogans.

TV’s Top 5 Sexiest Nerdettes

Posted on January 30, 2012 by Dabney B

It’s never been a better time to be a nerd. Twenty or so years ago, nerds were getting stuffed in lockers and given atomic wedges. I mean, that might still be the case now, but at least nerds nowadays can blossom into acceptable and loved socially awkward nerds.

That trend is becoming more and more evident on TV, with nerdettes getting more and more camera time. As I said in an earlier article, I’m liking this trend that nerd culture is becoming cooler. This focus on female nerds has the added bonus of breaking stereotypes, because it shows audiences that even book worms and brunettes in horn-rimmed glasses can be sexy, too.

5. Kaylee – Firefly

Image: Firefly Wikia

Kaylee’s bound to feel a bit outmatched when it comes to feminine charm aboard Serenity. On one side of her, she’s got Inara, a trained Companion who’s devoted her life to pleasing others. On the other, she’s got Zoe, an exotic Amazonian warrior goddess who kicks ass and still has time to have hot, sweaty alone time with her husband in bed.

But don’t let Kaylee’s inglorious occupation fool you. Her humble demeanor, southern twang, unabashed love of ships, and caring disposition make her the perfect gal. And be honest with yourself: those grease smudges are just too darned cute.

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4. Bernadette – The Big Bang Theory

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This squeaky blonde gives a new meaning to the term “mousey.” The miniscule Bernadette is uncharacteristically attractive considering the guy she’s dating (lucky douchebag). To be honest, I think she might even more good-looking than the resident “hot one.”

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3. Seven of Nine – Star Trek Voyager

Image: Well You Say That

Not only can this blonde bombshell calibrate a super computer to intercept the trajectory of a spacecraft at warp 9.6, but she’s also struggling to rediscover her human emotions and is looking for someone to teach her what it means to love again. And who knows — maybe her Borg hardware comes with built-in vibrating features.

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Just make sure you give her a chance to freshen up before heading out on a date together.

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2. Jess – The New Girl

The New Girl is getting rant reviews and is quickly developing its own set of devoted followers. But with the “adorkable” Zooey Deschanel at the forefront of the show, it’s hard not to get sucked in.

Image: People

Nyaww, isn’t she so cute? Makes you want to take her home with you, kind of like a puppy that’s so clumsy that it trips over its own paws.

1. Liz Lemon – 30 Rock

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My favorite nerd goddess of all time, Tina Fey brings out social ineptitude in 30 Rock’s Liz Lemon. One of the best gags of the show is that Liz is completely unsuccessful in the dating world as is often considered to be unattractive, which creates a weird but successful comedic effect, considering how attractive Tina Fey actually is. It’s kind of like that Twilight Zone episode with the ugly doctors. I mean, honestly, who red-blooded male wouldn’t be turned on by this?

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Fictional TV Foods We Have a Craving For

Posted on January 27, 2012 by Kris M.

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Eating food while watching TV is a common habit for many Americans, so it’s no surprise that TV shows often entice us with mouthwatering morsels to keep us watching. After all, that’s pretty much Food Network’s entire modus operandi in a nutshell.

However, the food you see on Food Network can be recreated at home, whereas food featured in scripted TV shows often exists only in TV land. That doesn’t stop fictional TV food from looking so delicious that we wish we could try a taste.

Fairy Fruits – True Blood

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Sure there was something sinister about these glowing fruits that made those who ate them become addicted and lose track of years of their life. But who could resist eating something that lights up?

Flaming Moe – The Simpsons

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The Flaming Moe, which began life as a Flaming Homer, took a kitchen sink approach to mixology. Just combine everything leftover in the bar, mix with some children’s cough syrup, apply fire and serve.

Popplers – Futurama

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This bite-sized fast food snack was actually the larva of an intelligent alien race. But considering how addictive Popplers became, we can’t help but want to try them regardless of their shady origin.

The Luther – The Boondocks

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When Granddad opened his own soul food restaurant, he created a burger that would put Paula Deen to shame. This monstrosity, which was named for Luther Vandross, contained a pound of meat, grilled onions, bacon and cheese between two donuts.

Cheesy Blasters – 30 Rock

In the world of 30 Rock, Cheesy Blasters is the number one food in America and a nightmare for those on a low-sodium diet. It’s a jack-cheese filled hot dog, wrapped up in a pizza and served by Meat Cat, a cartoon cat on a flying skateboard.

Romulan Ale – Star Trek

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Drinking Romulan Ale is a great way to get really hammered in a short amount of time. This infamous alcoholic drink is the most potent liquor in the Star Trek universe– it can even get a Klingon to loosen up.

Cornballers – Arrested Development

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The Cornballer was a failed kitchen appliance made by the Bluth Company that was discovered to be a safety hazard. We’d love to try these fried balls of corny goodness, we just don’t want to burn our hands making them.

Buzz Beer – The Drew Carey Show

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Drew and friends were home brewing beer before it was the cool thing to do. Their brew was called Buzz Beer because it combined the two best adult beverages ever invented—coffee and beer.

Krabby Patties – Spongebob Squarepants

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Krabby Patties are the Big Macs of Bikini Bottom and are made from a “secret recipe.” Since there are no cows underwater, we’re betting the patties are made from fish, which means Spongebob is serving his own neighbors to each other.

Chef’s Chocolate Salty Balls – South Park

All sexual innuendos aside, this snack food concocted by Chef sounds like it would be the perfect treat. The combination of salty and chocolate is always delicious, which is why we’d be glad to put these in our mouth.

Sundance Festival Altitude Claims its Newest Victim in Tracy Morgan; Cackles Evilly

Posted on January 24, 2012 by Bailey C.

Image Source: Planetrockstar.co.uk

It seems that the fates were attempting to throw a fresh cog into 30 Rock’s works as of yesterday when star and prime source of the show’s meta-comedy material Tracy Morgan collapsed at the Creative Coalition Spotlight Awards during the Sundance Film Festival. Continue reading →

The Week in Momentous TV News

Posted on January 20, 2012 by Bailey C.

Daniel Radcliffe Hosting Saturday Night Live

Image Source: Huffingtonpost.com

Ah, Friday. A time when all things seem new and possible. Unless you’re me, in which case you live in Portland so it’s raining and you have to get up at five-thirty in the morning and immediately interact with six-year-olds, which is a fate I would wish upon very few people. But though my socks might be dampened, my spirit is not–plus, it was quite the week for television. Continue reading →

I Watched the Season Premiere of 30 Rock…

Posted on January 17, 2012 by Bailey C.

Image Source: TVbyd1d1.blogspot.com

…Now what? Please don’t get me wrong. I have been a big fan of NBC’s Little Show That Could from the very start, entranced by the overwhelming zaniness of the proceedings almost as much as the way in which the show danced around cancellation. Continue reading →

All You Need to Know About This Sunday’s Golden Globes

Posted on January 13, 2012 by Bailey C.

Image Source: Starsentertainment.com

Awards season heralds swag, celebrity fashion and, in the case of certain film students (yours truly), outcomes of mostly meaningless awards races that I will be bitter about for years to come (I’m looking at you, A Beautiful Mind beating out Fellowship of the Ring.) Continue reading →