Seven Deadly Sins of Reality TV

Posted on February 7, 2012 by Kris M.

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If you ever need proof to support the argument that society is immoral, look no further than reality TV shows. If the seven deadly sins are a representation of the worst aspects of mankind, then reality shows are a look into the darkest facets of humanity. You can find each of the seven deadly sins in today’s reality programming—so if the world really does end in 2012, we know what to blame.

Pride – Project Runway, Top Chef, American Idol

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If there’s one thing every reality TV contest suffers from it’s a sense of pride. In order to put your art or your passion out there to be judged in front of an audience of millions, you have to have pride in your work. But nobody ever told these people that a little goes a long way.

Greed – The Apprentice, Fear Factor, Joe Millionaire

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When a reality show comes with a life-changing prize like cash or a job opportunity, contestants fight tooth and nail to get it. We love watching people backstab, form alliances and play mind games all for that sweet prize. TV shows where people consume animal semen for cash are a sign of how desperately greedy we’ve become.

Lust – The Bachelor, The Bachelorette, Next,

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Dating shows are always about a bunch of attractive meat bags burning through romantic partners in a rapid-fire race to find a compatible match. Leave it to reality television to make romance seem tawdry.

Envy – Made, Wife Swap, The Buried Life

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Everybody on reality TV wants to be somebody else. People are ready to trade lives in a heartbeat just to see what else is out there, but in the end the lesson almost always boils down to being grateful for what you have—your fifteen minutes of fame.

Gluttony – The Biggest Loser, Fat Chef, Intervention

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In a world of overconsumption these reality shows try to preach a message of self-control while allowing viewers to indulge in the pleasure of watching other people lose control. It’s hard to admit to your own gluttonous behaviors when there are so many people on reality TV that are worse off than you.

Wrath – Jersey Shore, The Real World, The Bad Girls Club

You have to tread lightly around reality TV stars because they can go from zero to crazy in the blink of an eye. There’s a very simple equation to these types of reality shows—gather a bunch of people with volatile personalities, trap them in an enclosed space and add alcohol. The result is a steady stream of swearing, screaming and drunken fist fighting.

Sloth – Hoarders, Supernanny, What Not to Wear

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No need to do anything for yourself anymore because reality TV crews are ready and willing to clean out your house, raise your children and make sure you don’t look ridiculous when you go outside. In China, they have shows where contestants go after their dream jobs, while in America we have shows about how to not let our kids act like monsters.

The Voice Returns, Scores A Touchdown With Me

Posted on February 6, 2012 by Kate W.

christina aguilera blake shelton adam levine cee lo green the voice performance

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For weeks, some of us have breathlessly anticipated the kickoff of the major competition that aired last night. Wait, football who? No, I’m not talking about the Super Bowl. After that. That’s right. The Voice is back!

I’m not going to lie; I used to watch American Idol. I love music, and I’m a sucker for any kind of competition. But I always skipped the mean-spirited auditions, and by the time I started watching, I didn’t have a clue who anyone was, so I couldn’t get invested.

Continue reading →

Steve Jones Leaves X-Factor; America Has Brian Dunkleman Flashbacks

Posted on January 31, 2012 by Kris M.

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The X-Factor had a successful premiere season under normal circumstances—but since this is Simon Cowell we’re talking about, the expectations were set a little too high. Fox expected lightning to strike twice, with X-Factor poised to become the next American Idol-sized hit. Unfortunately, since that didn’t happen, the powers-that-be have demanded a sacrifice—host Steve Jones.

It’s easy to put the blame on Steve Jones, who kept the show running but never quite caught on in popularity the way American Idol host Ryan Seacrest has. You don’t have to be an American Idol fan to know who Ryan Seacrest is—he’s practically a national treasure at this point. However, if you didn’t watch The X-Factor, would you be able to pick Steve Jones out of a crowd?

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That may be the problem that Simon Cowell is trying to rectify by letting go of Jones—however it could be a case of curing the symptoms, not the disease. The relative obscurity of Steve Jones is more a telltale sign of the show’s lack of promotion and relevance to pop culture. Kelly Clarkson was a household name when she won the first American Idol because the show was closely followed by the media and news outlets. X-Factor winner Melanie Amaro is as much of an unknown to the general public as Steve Jones, but since Cowell can’t fire her it’s Jones who must be cut loose.

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The downfall of Jones is also a bit of history repeating as American Idol also lost one of its hosts after the first season. Brian Dunkleman was originally a co-host alongside Ryan Seacrest, but left the show after one year. Dunkleman’s departure from Idol is often considered one of the all-time infamous career killing moves, although some sources speculate that Dunkleman was on his way to getting the axe anyway. Hopefully things will work out better for Steve Jones than it did for Dunkleman and that his career can survive.

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X-Factor judges Nicole Scherzinger and Paula Abdul will also be joining Jones in line at the unemployement office as Cowell has admitted that the show will undergo some heavy retooling for season two. It’s anybody’s guess as to who will be the one to replace Steve Jones and which new faces we’ll see behind the judge’s table, but it’s obvious that Cowell wants us to sit up and take notice.

Did Jim Carrey’s Daughter Jane Get Special Treatment on American Idol?

Posted on January 25, 2012 by Kris M.

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One of the American Idol contestants going into Hollywood Week is already familiar with Tinseltown because she happens to be Hollywood royalty. Jane Carrey, daughter of actor Jim Carrey, walked away with one of the coveted spots in the Top 24 after belting out a rendition of the Bonnie Raitt tune Something to Talk About.

Only now her performance has truly lived up to its title as sources report the famous daughter received preferential treatment. A source told Radar Online that Jane Carrey did not have to wait outside for hours like other hopefuls and that her audition was more like a set appointment. This has given Idol fans and critics something to talk about with everyone wondering whether or not Jane’s dad used his connections at Fox to get her into the Top 24.

This wouldn’t be the first time that Idol has come under scrutiny for its Top 24 choices as several contestants have already been recording artists or been in recording contracts. The recent controversy with Jane Carrey seems like more of the same contestant grooming that’s made many accuse American Idol of being rigged in recent years.

Remember When American Idol Represented the American Dream?

In an effort to stay relevant and keep from hemorrhaging ratings, the producers of American Idol have sacrificed the very core concept of the show—that anyone could be the next big singing star. American Idol is built on the back of the American Dream, so to see contestants receiving preferential treatment spits in the face of that concept.

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The current Idol landscape would make it impossible for salt of the earth contestants like Fantasia Barrino to get a leg up in the competition. Remember how gangly and weird Clay Aiken was before he hit it big on American Idol? You don’t see contestants like that anymore, except for the losers who don’t get past the audition phase.

In a society that is becoming more aware of the disparages between the upper class and the rest of us, is this the message that Idol wants to be sending? Sure Jane Carrey seems like a good person and a decent singer, but she has all the connections in the world to begin her own recording career.

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Instead she’s taking away the opportunity of a talented singer who doesn’t have the same resources at her disposal. A talented singer who actually waited outside for days in the cold for her only chance to make it big and didn’t float by on her family name.

Do you think Jane Carrey received special treatment? Is this shark-jumping territory for you or are you waiting with anticipation to see how Jane stacks up?

From Television Stars to Oscar Winners

Posted on January 25, 2012 by Kris M.

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The nominees for the 2012 Academy Awards were announced yesterday and a number of television actors are up for the coveted Oscar statuette. One surprising nomination was comedian Melissa McCarthy of Mike and Molly and Gilmore Girls fame. McCarthy is up for Best Supporting Actress for her scene-stealing role in the comedy Bridesmaids.

Other former television actors include Michelle Williams, who got her start onDawson’s Creek, as a serious Best Actress contender for her performance as Marilyn Monroe in My Week with Marilyn. George Clooney, who got his big break as a hunky doctor on the medical drama ER, is up for a Best Actor for his role in The Descendents.

If any of these actors take home the Oscar on February 26, it wouldn’t be the first time that a television actor rose up through the Hollywood ranks to win acting’s most prestigious award. The following actors all belong to an elite group of thespians who got their big break in television.

Tom Hanks – Best Actor, Philadelphia, Forrest Gump

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Although Hanks has won a number of accolades for his work as a dramatic actor, he started out as a comedian working in television. Hanks performed in drag for two seasons of the ABC sitcom Bosom Buddies when he was first starting out.

Jamie Foxx – Best Actor, Ray

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Before his award-winning performance of Ray Charles, Jamie Foxx was a performer on the sketch comedy show In Living Color. Foxx went on to star in his own sitcom, The Jamie Foxx Show before becoming a serious dramatic actor.

Robin Williams – Best Actor, Good Will Hunting

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Robin William’s best skill is the ability to make audiences laugh and cry all at the same time. However, there wasn’t an ounce of drama in him when he played Mork, the eponymous alien from Mork & Mindy.

Sally Field – Best Actress, Norma Rae, Places in the Heart

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Sally Field’s first Oscar acceptance speech is the stuff of legends. Although, audiences “liked her, really liked her” as Gidget and The Flying Nun before she was an Oscar winning actress and continue to like her on the drama Brothers and Sisters.

Cher – Best Actress, Moonstruck

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Cher has always been known as a musician, but this pop diva has also had a successful acting career. Before she won her Oscar she was performing sketch comedy with her ex-husband on The Sonny and Cher Show.

Helen Hunt – Best Actress, As Good as It Gets

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Helen Hunt was already a household name for her role in the sitcom Mad About You when she took home the Oscar. In fact, Hunt is the first actor to win an Oscar while simultaneously starring in a television show.

Jennifer Hudson – Best Supporting Actress, Dreamgirls

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It’s pretty impressive that Jennifer Hudson won an Academy Award for her acting debut in Dreamgirls. Even more impressive is the fact that this former American Idol contestant is the first reality show star to win an Oscar.

Mo’Nique – Best Supporting Actress, Precious

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Comedian Mo’Nique stunned audiences with her gritty portrayal of an inner-city mother in Precious. Mo’Nique is best known from her comedic TV role on The Parkers and as host of The Mo’Nique Show.

Melissa Leo – Best Supporting Actress, The Fighter

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The most recent winner in the Best Support Actress category, Melissa Leo got her big break in the TV drama Homicide: Life on the Streets. She currently plays Toni in the HBO series Treme.

Steven Tyler Sings Nation’s Anthem, Said Nation Squirms in Discomfort

Posted on January 23, 2012 by Bailey C.

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Sunday’s AFC Championship got off to a rocky start as its trademark gravitas and dignity was sapped by Aerosmith frontman, American Idol judge and “singer” Steven Tyler. Resplendent in a red, white and blue sequined Patriots scarf, he performed our country’s venerable National Anthem before a crowd of thousands, Continue reading →

Only Twenty-Two Million People Watched American Idol Last Night

Posted on January 20, 2012 by Bailey C.

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It seems as far as massively popular television shows go (and we’re looking at you, Jersey Shore), 2012′s ratings are turning into the equivalent of a slow eyebrow raise. Though it’s still the most popular television show in America by a wide margin, Continue reading →

Viewer Profile: The Hate-Watcher

Posted on January 20, 2012 by Kris M.

If you didn’t like sports, you wouldn’t sign up for a softball team. If you became a vegetarian, you wouldn’t go out to eat at a steakhouse. Then why is it when you hate a TV show, you don’t always stop watching?

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Chances are you might just be a hate-watcher, a select category of TV viewer that watches TV shows with the sole purpose of hating everything about it. These are the people that complain about how much they can’t stand Jersey Shore, yet they tune in every week.

This phenomenon should not be confused with a guilty pleasure, which is a TV show you feel guilty about watching, but actually secretly love. Instead, hate-watching is more like an act of masochism—you know you hate the show, but that’s also part of the appeal.

Why Do We Hate-Watch?

That’s not to say there isn’t a place for hate-watching during your TV time. We all watch TV to illicit some type of emotional response—sitcoms make us laugh and forget about our worries, while dramas provide us with a cathartic experience to let out our strong emotions.

Therefore, wouldn’t it be safe to say that the shows we hate-watch give us the opportunity to explore our angry emotions in a healthy way? After all, it’s better to be mad at some people on your TV screen, than the people in your daily life.

The Internet has allowed the hate-watching phenomenon grow in numbers over the past few years. Hate-watchers now have the opportunity to meet other hate-watchers online and talk about how much they hate a show in real time while they watch it together. Thanks to the Internet, there are a number of different sub-categories of hate-watchers, including but not limited to:

The Fanboy Hate-Watcher

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This breed of hate-watcher actually liked the show they are watching—back when it was good. The fanboy hate-watcher hates American Idol without Paula and Simon, Family Guy without Cleveland and The Simpsons after Season 8—yet all three shows are on his DVR.

The Political Hate-Watcher

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The political hate-watcher views TV shows that clash with her political views. She’s the liberal that tunes into Fox News or the conservative that watches The Daily Show. Maybe she’s just trying to learn about the enemy, or maybe she just has a secret crush on Glenn Beck.

The Generational Hate-Watcher

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The generational hate-watcher likes to watch shows that are not intended for his age-group, yet hates that he can’t enjoy them. The hate-watcher knows he’s too old for MTV and he hates every show on the network, but he watches it every day.

The Hipster Hate-Watcher

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This hate-watcher hated watching TV before it was cool. When she hate-watches a TV show, she’s doing it for the sake of irony. The only reason her and her friends get together to watch The Bachelor each week is to make fun of the contestants.

Are you a closet hate-watcher? Do you watch TV shows with the sole purpose of hating them? What TV shows do you love to hate-watch?

Is the TV Theme Song an Endangered Species?

Posted on January 4, 2012 by Kris M.

We’ve all heard the story of a man named Brady, moved on up to the east side and learned the facts of life through TV theme song lyrics. In the early days of television, the theme song of any given TV show might provide you with the entire premise of the plot As long as you heard the theme song, you’d never wonder why Green Acres was the place to be or how the castaways of the S.S. Minnow wound up on Gilligan’s Island.

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The TV theme song is quickly becoming a lost art form. Nowadays many TV shows rely on quick title cards with short instrumental accompaniment to save time. Sacrificing a theme song allows producers to have more available time for the show itself, while still allowing for commercial breaks. The theme song from “Lost” wasn’t even a song—it was just one long crescendo with the title flying towards you.

Instrumental themes are a popular choice in modern television programming because they can be easily shortened whenever the producers need to save on time. “The Office” seems to have a multitude of different openings, depending on how much time they need for the episode. Reality shows get away with not needing an opening title sequence because they can rely on narration instead. Even shows about music, like “American Idol” and “Glee” have title cards instead of the full-blown musical numbers they deserve.

Since premium channels are commercial free there is more time for an opening theme, therefore more HBO and Showtime shows have longer title sequences. However, the majority of premium channel programming still relies on instrumental tracks or pre-existing pop music for theme songs, despite the extra time and budget afforded to them to create original pieces.

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Theme songs could possibly be disappearing completely from premium channels too. The Showtime series “Weeds” used to play a different version of the folk song “Little Boxes” in almost every episode—for the first few seasons anyway. From the fourth season afterward, the theme has been completely replaced by a shortened title card sequence with no theme music whatsoever.

There still lies some hope for classic TV theme songs in the genre of animation. Adult animated comedies like “Family Guy” and “South Park” keep the tradition going with tongue-in-cheek theme songs reminiscent of yesteryear. Children’s shows also continue to produce catchy theme songs—after all, everybody knows who lives in a pineapple under the sea and how to get to Sesame Street.

Future generations of TV watchers may never get to experience the excitement of a good TV theme song, other than from old reruns. Cherish these moments and these catchy tunes while you still can.

A TV Watcher’s Prayer for 2012

Posted on January 4, 2012 by Bailey C.

Image Source: RealityTV Magazine

I. Lord, let all Cheftestants in cooking competitions as far as the eye can see attempt to create either risotto or dessert. I know not why making a creamy rice or a decent chocolate chip cookie should prove to be so difficult for chefs who are perfectly comfortable with sous-vide, liquid nitrogen and/or cooking food in hot magma; I know only that there is a certain grim, delicious timbre in the way Tom Colicchio growls, “You ruined…the RISOTTO.” Continue reading →